Rethinking Discipline

I've been told more than once that I have a level of discipline people don't see very often. Every time someone says that, I almost laugh a little because I don't feel anywhere near perfect with self-discipline. There are still days I procrastinate, days I don't feel motivated, and days I'd rather do almost anything else than follow through on the things I've committed to.

So when people ask where my discipline comes from, I've spent a lot of time thinking about it.

The answer isn't that I have extraordinary willpower. I actually don't believe discipline comes from having some special ability to always do the right thing. I think discipline is about deciding what kind of life you want, creating routines that support it, and keeping the promises you make to yourself as you build that life.

For me, that means I've built routines around my priorities. Instead of constantly negotiating with myself in the moment, I've created routines that help me stay aligned with the things that matter most.

The following are a few of my routines that touch different areas of my life: my faith, my health, my responsibilities, and even the things that bring me joy.

One of the biggest examples happens before my eyes even open in the morning.

Years ago, I heard a pastor say, "Don't let your feet hit the floor until your knees hit the floor." Now, obviously, you don't have to pray on your knees. I've prayed while driving, walking, sitting in meetings, and in plenty of other places throughout the day. Prayer isn't limited to one posture or one location. But, I don't get out of bed until I've spent time in prayer and in my Bible. Even if I'm running late. Even if I have a busy day ahead. That comes first because it sets the tone for everything that follows. I don't want the first voice I hear each morning to be my endless to-do list. I want my mind grounded before the day begins.

Another routine is tied to something much simpler: water.

For optimal health, we're told to drink about half our body weight in ounces of water each day. For me, that works out to about three bottles of water. I realized if I waited until I "felt like it," I wasn't going to drink enough. So I made a rule. I don't allow myself to eat until I've had my water. If I'm going to eat breakfast, I drink a bottle of water first. If I'm ready for lunch, I drink another bottle first. Before dinner, I finish the last one. I don't have to debate it every day because the decision has already been made.

The same principle applies to something I genuinely love: dancing.

If you've followed me for very long, you know how much dancing means to me. It's exercise, but it's also a major joy point. It clears my head, builds confidence, relieves stress, and simply makes me happy. Because I enjoy it so much, it became the perfect reward. I don't go dancing until my work is finished for the day. If I'm planning to dance both Friday and Saturday, I make sure I've caught up on the things around the house first. Laundry gets folded. The car gets detailed. The house gets deep-cleaned. The little responsibilities that are easy to ignore get handled before I go have fun. This protects my priorities.

Another routine I've added more recently started with one simple goal, but it ended up helping me in more ways than I anticipated.

Like a lot of people, stress can send me mindlessly grazing. I also noticed I was getting up from my desk constantly throughout the day. Sometimes it was for water. Sometimes it was for the bathroom. Sometimes I wasn't even sure why I got up. Perhaps it was just restlessness in general. So I gave every trip away from my desk a purpose. Every time I stand up, I have to complete a short exercise routine before doing anything else. It starts small: ten crunches, a ten-second plank, ten push-ups, ten squats, and a few simple arm exercises. Each subsequent time I get up, I add one more repetition. Over time, what started as a tiny commitment became a quick few-minute workout several times throughout my day. It has helped me eat less, stay focused longer because I'm not getting up as often, and allowed me to move my body more without needing to block out an entire workout session. As an added bonus, I've started seeing more muscle tone and definition instead of the weight gain that was happening from all the mindless munching.

None of these routines are complicated. None of them require incredible self-discipline in the moment.

That's actually the point.

I've learned that discipline isn't usually built by making better decisions. It's built by making fewer decisions. When your priorities are decided ahead of time, you stop negotiating with yourself every day. The routine carries you on the days motivation disappears.

Will I always do it perfectly? No. Absolutely not.

But I know this much...

The promises we consistently keep to ourselves shape the person we become. They become the building blocks of the life we're creating. And the smallest routines can subtly produce the biggest transformations.